Professor Popinjay's Compendium of Perspicacity

By Prof. Popinjay

First published May 27, 2019

10: Establish an oppressive regime and rule with an iron fist.

9: Leave long hairs in the shower drain.

8: Torture you for information.

7: Hang wet clothes everywhere in the house.

6: Suck fatty cigars and purposefully blow smoke in your face.

5: Accuse you of eating the chocolate out the Neapolitan ice cream container.

4: Run a Billion dollar drug cartel to fund their operations.

3: Shop for pretty shoes on their phone all day.

2: Execute anyone who opposes their indomitable will.

1: Wear frumpy nightgowns.