Professor Popinjay's Compendium of Perspicacity

A Non-review by Professor Popinjay

Another in the “Road to” comedy series with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby doing their usual hijinks and fighting over the same woman. That is a full endorsement by the way. These films are all pretty enjoyable and this one, so far, has quickly become a favorite among them. The humor seems just a smidge smarter in Road to Rio.

I loved the Doctor on the cruise ship who seemed more ill than his patient and conversely the patient ends up caring for the doctor more than the other way around. Wait, did that happen in this movie or Romance on the High Seas? I’m confused. You’ll see why next Non-review.

This stands out as being one of I’m sure only a few films which supposedly take place in Rio de Janeiro but does not feature stock footage or even new footage from Carnaval. While most films taking place in Rio take advantage of the major (and free) spectacle that is Carnaval, Road to Rio did not. This is likely because it was pretty much all filmed on a sound stage and on a very low budget. They never actually went to Rio.

There are some decent party-ish scenes though. Nothing on the grand scale of Carnaval but the musical numbers by the Andrews Sisters and the Wiere Brothers are pretty good. In fact the Wiere Brothers were hilarious. I could watch a full movie with those guys. Unfortunately they’re a bunch of German white guys in brown face for this film so that was disappointing to learn. Strange they could do brown face when this was a black and white movie.

The absolute best part… and yes, I am going to SPOILER this here because I’m sure the majority of readers will not just up and go see this movie… 

the best and greatest joke of this movie (and possibly all time) comes near the end when our heroes are crashing the wedding. Away off in a different scene a random cavalry, lead by none other than Jerry Colonna, comes racing out of the blue without reason or purpose. What is this!?! Who are these people!?! Where did they come from!?! What will they do when they get to the wedding!?! As the scene at the wedding progresses, we keep cutting back to these cavaliers racing frantically, waving swords and firing guns in the air, hooting and hollering. Even as our heroes come to the climactic “j’acuse!” moment and the plot begins to resolve, yea, even into the epilogue, the cavalry is still periodically shown, riding with all speed! The movie is over! What could possibly be left for this small army to do!?! I’m on the edge of my freakin’ seat! The movie is now completely over. Finally, Jerry Colonna rides up to the camera with army in tow, horses and all, and says, “Well, we didn’t make it in time. Exciting though, wasn’t it?” The end. Friggin’ brilliant.

P.S.- Look for classic horror actor and wrestler Tor Johnson making a brief appearance at the beginning of this film. Always nice to see him having a good time in a role.