Professor Popinjay's Compendium of Perspicacity

A Non-review by Professor Popinjay

(1942)

It seems I’ve migrated from Doris Day and Shirley Temple films over to Irving Berlin films. God help me!

At the very least, we’ve had the film White Christmas (1954) on in the background during the Christmas season for three years now, ever since I got married again. It’s a charming film and despite having an oil tanker full of prezzies to wrap before Christmas morning, I invariably end up quite distracted by the film.

It’s said amongst White Christmas aficionados the film has a predecessor; not a prequel but another Irving Berlin film from whence White Christmas is heir-apparent. It even features the song “White Christmas” and stars Bing Crosby.

Naturally, this piqued our interest and we decided we needed to see “Holiday Inn.” We wondered why this film, considering what it supposedly evolved into, would be swept under the rug and effectively forgotten. Now we know.

The plot is basically a vehicle for several Americana musical pieces featuring songs by Bing and dance routines by Fred Astaire (or “Fredastaire” as I thought his name was in my childhood). This would have been fine were it not for the multiple instances of people dressing up in black face. Oof. Not just black face, but black face and multiple stiff pigtails. They didn’t even bother making her hair black. She had black face with platinum blonde pigtails. I can’t tell you what is more offensive: full black face with dyed black hair or a half-assed attempt at black face with blond pigtails. It was downright shameful.

The actual African-Americans in the film (primarily Louise Beavers) were allotted to the kitchen help and were your standard personification of stereotypes. They even called her Mamie. Hoo-boy. It just gets better and better. Except to match all the white people in blackface for the minstrel scene, Louise performed in blackface too! ¡Aye Caramba! Just let the woman be!

She was a lovely woman and her children were adorable. I appreciated that they all got singing parts and aside from their station, no other slurs or jokes were made at their expense. Bing was especially kind to them.

As for the story… there might have been some drama created by Bing at one point but thanks to some good writing (FINALLY) rather than perpetuate the drama by being snubby and uncommunicative, she actually calls Bing on his crap in good time and asserts herself and how she feels about being manipulated by him. And Bing acts accountable in that very instance.

The resolution came later but certainly not due to any trumped up miscommunication or lack thereof. It was actually refreshing. Even White Christmas was guilty of generating drama through overheard conversations taken out of context and blown out of proportion. This gem of a moment certainly isn’t enough to redeem Holliday Inn, but it’s a nice moment nevertheless.

Bing and Fred are depicted as friends throughout the film but Fred is just an absolute piece of shit from start to finish, stealing or trying to steal Bing’s sweethearts left and right. Thankfully the second lady wasn’t one to be jerked around. Bing spent the film trying to hide her from Fred. There were moments in their “friendship” where I wondered if this film was going to end in a murder! It wasn’t at all that kind of film! Nevertheless, most of the time I was vehement on behalf of Bing! Like dude! Get that butthole OUT of your life!

The scene where Fred dances drunk with Marjorie Reynolds is quite the spectacle. Another scene with these two dancing but Bing keeps abruptly changing the music on them so they won’t slow down and kiss…that’s pretty funny. Maybe look these scenes up on YouTube and save yourself the time and embarrassment from having to admit you watched it in its entirety.

As for me, don’t worry, I used to wear neon hammer pants in the 80’s. Embarrassment is no longer a concern of mine.