Category: Non-Reviews
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Lake Placid
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Dude. This movie was rad. Betty White. Huge Crocodile. What’s not to love? Casting Oliver Platt didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. Just didn’t seem like his kind of movie. Maybe he just needed the work. The scene with the grizzly bear!…
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Karate Kid (The)
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Every kid I know either wanted to know karate or claimed they did know it just before embarrassing the crap out of themselves and breaking their hand on a fresh piece of lumber. I was the latter. I remember running around the neighborhood playing tag…
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Jack and the Cuckoo Clock Heart
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Also known as Jack et la Méchanique du Cœur (Zhak eh la mekaneek doo sewer) in its original French, this is an animated rock opera written and performed by Matthias Malzieu and his band Dionysos. There is definitely a cognitive story here but there are…
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I Am Legend
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Apparently I Am Legend is what The Omega Man with Charlton Heston was based on? There were some similarities. I think I liked this movie. The effects with the hordes of zombie guys (hemocytes) were pretty impressive. They were just pummeling things to oblivion with…
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Hackers
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay I know I probably say this a lot but I thought this movie was the shizznit when I was a kid. Hackers!?! Are you serious? I wanted to be a hacker! I wasn’t even exactly sure what a hacker was but they looked like cool…
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G-Force
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Not to be confused with Glitter Force. In this case the G stands for Gerbil! That’s right. This is a one of those gerbil films you keep hearing about and any movie with Gerbils as the main characters is alright in my book. Especially when…
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Face/Off
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Notice the slash? That’s to differentiate this film title from a 1971 hockey movie. That’s something you know now. Ah the 90’s; when John Woo, Nicolas Cage, and John Travolta were allowed to do whatever they wanted on screen. Can’t do that anymore though! Might…
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Quiet Place (A): Day One
Aside from, again, not fully grasping how echolocation works, the only thing this film did wrong in my opinion was not giving Djimon Hounsou a bigger part. He’s awesome! Why is he always a side character? So anyway, echolocation. I feel like anything, space monster or what have you, with…
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Ed
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay You got a baseball playing monkey. You got a baseball playing Matt LeBlanc. That’s about all I remember about this movie. I don’t think the monkey was supposed to have superpowers but he could throw that baseball like a rocket. Everything I’ve read about this…
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Daddy Day Care
A Non-Review by Professor Popinjay I find no fault with this movie. I appreciated the sentiment that men can be capable of effectively caring for multiple children and are not all of them irresponsible weirdos. The guys in vegetable costumes fighting each other needs to be a new reality show.…
