Category: Non-Reviews
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Return to Silent Hill
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2026) I actually watched the first two films so I could see this one too but I decided I didn’t care to see it in the theater. My interest was piqued simply by my fascination with translating video game plots into cinema. Historically, it’s been…
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Yours, Mine & Ours VS Yours, Mine and Ours (2005) (1968)
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay I get these mixed up with the Cheaper by the Dozen films. I’m not fond of those but we’ll get to them eventually. Today I’ll be considering the 1968 Yours, Mine and Ours film in comparison to the 2005 remake titled similarly as Yours, Mine…
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Beavis and Butthead Do America
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (1996) I used to watch these two idiots. I used to impersonate these two idiots. One time a friend and I drove a guy nuts in a very long line to get on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad in Disneyland as we relentlessly quoted lines from…
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Super Mario Galaxy Movie
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2026) I’m kind of glad this wasn’t an event populated solely by screaming middle-schoolers like the Five Nights at Freddy’s sequel was. Mario is for people who scream at theaters as well as people who don’t scream at theaters! It was a variety attending the…
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Paris, Wine & Romance
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2019) I have to hand it to director Alex Zamm. It takes an amazing amount of Bijoux de famille to do a film about Paris, wine and Oregon without doing a shred of research. An even more amazing feat is only hiring actors and crew…
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Snow Monster vs. Ice Shark
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2021) Oof! I’m not cranking these out so fast anymore. I write during slow periods at work and we ain’t had no slow periods! Why do people go to lunch at 2:30pm? There’s never just a lunch rush. It’s just busy all day long. Anyway,…
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Detective Pikachu
(2019) [Originally published May 31,2019. Edited here for grammar and clarity and added content. Okay, I pretty much rewrote the whole thing but my kids remain fairly tiny still because we saw this in the theater years ago and the jokes depend on that context.] I still find it strange…
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Monuments Men
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2014) George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, and John Goodman. No this is not a crossover of Ocean’s 11, Ghostbusters, and O Brother Where Art Thou… amazing as that would be. No, this is a real life Indiana Jones film but with fewer cgi gophers.…
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Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret.
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay (2023) THIS ARTICLE IS FOR MEN ONLY!!! …or women if they really really want to. “Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret” is the story of a girl’s journey to womanhood that will help you be a better man… or whatever you are. I like…
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Mark Twain (The Adventures of) / The Star Child
A Non-review by Professor Popinjay Yes, this is a Non-review for two separate titles. I don’t think I could bear a combination of the two into one film. The Adventures of Mark Twain (1985) The Star Child (1989) The reason I watched these back to back and I am considering…
Professor Popinjay's Compendium of Perspicacity 